I spent last Tuesday staring at my bank statement (and my UPI history) that looked less like a plan and more like a confession.
You know that feeling when you check your balance after a busy month? It’s a mix of confusion and mild betrayal. “I spent how much on cafes? Did I really need three different OTT subscriptions? Why is there a Swiggy transaction from 11 PM on a Tuesday?”
We are often told that the solution to this feeling is “budgeting.” But let’s be honest: the word “budget” feels like a punishment. It feels like a diet. It sounds like restriction, saying “no” to plans, and cutting out the fun stuff until you’re miserable but solvent.
As someone who believes life is something you design, not just something you endure, I realized I was approaching it all wrong. I didn’t need a stricter diet for my wallet. I needed a better operating system.
I poured a chai, opened my laptop, and asked myself: If I were building my life from scratch today, would I pay for the life I’m currently living?
The “Default Settings” Trap
Most of us live our financial lives on “Default Settings.”
We sign up for things because “everyone else has them.” We buy clothes because of the Diwali or Independence Day sale. We upgrade our phones just because the EMI looks manageable. We drift into spending habits not because they make us happy, but because they are the path of least resistance.
I realized my spending wasn’t a reflection of what I loved. It was just a reflection of my habits.
I was spending money on “phantom costs”—things that sat in the background, draining resources without adding value.
- The gym membership I used twice a month (because I thought I should go).
- The excessive delivery fees on Zomato because I was too disorganized to cook.
- The random impulse buys from Instagram ads that looked good for five minutes.
The Fix: I performed a “Life Audit.” I didn’t just look at the numbers; I looked at the value. I printed out my last three months of expenses and went through them with a highlighter. I marked everything that gave me genuine joy or solved a real problem in Green. I marked everything that was just “habit” or “laziness” in Red.
The goal wasn’t to stop spending. It was to stop drifting.
Designing for Human Nature (Not Robots)
The problem with most traditional budgets is that they assume you are a robot. They assume you will always make the logical choice. They assume you will never have a bad day, never get invited to a last-minute wedding, and never need a spontaneous trip to the hills.
I used to try to set rigid rules: “I will spend exactly ₹5,000 on outside food and not a rupee more.”
Then, Wednesday would hit. I’d be tired from work, the fridge would be empty, and I’d order a biryani. Then I’d feel guilty. Then I’d give up on the budget entirely because I’d “already failed.”
The Redesign: I stopped fighting my nature and started designing around it.
I realized I need flexibility. So, instead of rigid categories, I created a “Guilt-Free Zone.” This is a pot of money (say, ₹5,000 or ₹10,000 a month) specifically designed to be wasted. It’s for the overpriced coffee, the random gadget, the auto-rickshaw when I could have taken the metro.
Paradoxically, by giving myself permission to be imperfect, I spent less. The psychological pressure was off. I wasn’t failing my system; I had designed a system that could handle my humanity.
The “Sleep Well” Tax
In India, we are obsessed with “Returns.” We want the highest interest rate on our FDs, the best performing SIPs, the gold that appreciates. But I’ve learned that the best return on investment is a good night’s sleep.
For a long time, I ran my finances close to the edge. I invested almost everything because “cash loses value to inflation.” Logically, I was right. Emotionally, I was stressed.
Every time a weird noise came from my car engine, or I heard rumors of layoffs in the tech sector, my heart rate spiked.
The Shift: I started building what I call a “Sleep Well Fund.” This isn’t just an emergency fund. It’s a buffer large enough that I don’t have to worry about the small stuff. It’s money that sits in a liquid fund or a savings account doing absolutely nothing—and that’s the point. Its job isn’t to beat inflation; its job is to sit there and look boring so I can feel calm.
I realized that Peace of Mind is a valid expense. It’s okay to “lose” a little bit to inflation if the trade-off is that you walk through life without a knot in your stomach.
Buying Time, Not Stuff (The EMI Trap)
The biggest shift in my “Financial Architecture” came when I changed what I was trying to buy.
For years, I used money to buy upgrades: a better phone, a bigger car, branded shoes. We live in an EMI culture now where everything seems affordable because it’s “only ₹3,000 a month.”
But those EMIs stack up. And eventually, you realize the ultimate luxury isn’t goods. It’s sovereignty.
Sovereignty is the ability to say “no.”
- If you have heavy EMIs, you have to say “yes” to a boss you hate.
- If you have high monthly expenses, you have to say “yes” to working on weekends.
- If you have no savings, you have to say “yes” to stress.
I started asking myself a new question before every big purchase: “Would I rather have this object, or would I rather have this amount of freedom?”
Suddenly, the new car didn’t look like a status symbol. It looked like five years of monthly payments that would chain me to my desk. The freedom to take a month off to visit family, or to work on a passion project, became more valuable than any physical item I could show off.
The Blueprint (Knowing Your “Why”)
You cannot build a house without a blueprint. If you try, you just end up with a pile of bricks and a confused contractor.
Yet, most of us try to build our financial lives without a blueprint. We save “because we should.” We invest in SIPs “because everyone says so.” But we don’t know what we’re building towards.
Without a “Why,” saving money just feels like deprivation.
I sat down and wrote out my Personal Blueprint. I defined what a “Rich Life” actually looks like for me, not what Instagram or my relatives say it looks like.
- For me, it’s not a massive villa. It’s a comfortable, modern flat with good WiFi and a great workspace.
- It’s not eating at 5-star hotels every week. It’s having the budget to buy high-quality ingredients and cook healthy meals.
- It’s not retiring at 60. It’s having the flexibility to work on projects I care about, on my own terms.
Once I had the Blueprint, spending became easy. Does this purchase fit the blueprint? No? Then it’s clutter. Get rid of it.
It’s All Just a System
When you stop looking at money as a judgment on your character and start treating it like a system you can design, everything changes.
You stop feeling guilty about the past and start getting curious about the future. You treat your finances like a home renovation. You pull the weeds (subscriptions), you fix the foundation (savings), and you plant the things that make you happy.
So, open up that bank statement or your UPI app. Don’t look at it with fear. Look at it like an architect looking at a floor plan.
Where are the walls in the wrong place? Where can you let in more light?
This is your life. You get to design it.
Actionable Next Steps
- The “Subscription Audit”: Check your bank statement for recurring charges (Netflix, Hotstar, Spotify, Gym). If you haven’t used it in 30 days, cancel it. You can always resubscribe later.
- Define Your “Guilt-Free” Number: Pick a realistic amount (e.g., ₹2,000 or ₹5,000) that you are allowed to blow on absolutely anything this month without tracking it.
- Name Your “Sleep Well” Fund: Open a separate savings account (or a Liquid Fund) and name it “Freedom Fund” or “Peace of Mind.” Start transferring a small amount automatically every month.